Real Talk with the Pastor’s Wife focuses on the challenges that the pastor’s wife may encounter in the ministry. As a pastor’s wife of eight years, I have only stretched the surface of challenges that we may face and how they may affect us mentally, physically, and spiritually.
Real Talk with the Pastor’s Wife was birthed out of my own experience with conflict within the church, especially with other women. I wanted answers to a few questions; God, why are you allowing this to happen? Did we truly hear from God to start the ministry? What did I do wrong? Why do they hate me? I had so many questions that I need God to answer. Have you ever had these questions and feelings?
Maybe we have been asking the wrong questions. We should not ask God, what should I do, but who do you want me to be? We often have conflict or trials in our lives to make us strong, thus enabling us to become all that God wants us to be. I had to search the scriptures, pray, fast, and seek His face to discover what I should do. When all the while, God's will for my life was looking me right in the face. God wants us to go through this process of conflict and hurt to work some things out of us, so we can stop asking “what” and start asking “who.” Who do you want me to be?
The bible tells us there is always a chance of offense that may lead to conflict within the ministry. We may not always discuss these conflicts with our spouses because we try our best to shield him from any additional stressors as pastor's wives. Therefore, we may keep things that happen in ministry to ourselves and handling them on our own. Sometimes, this is not always the best discussion because it adds all the stress upon our shoulders. God has indeed chosen the pastor to be the head of the ministry; however, the wife has various roles in the ministry's success. The pastor’s wife’s leadership skills to resolve problems within the ministry will allow the pastor to focus on the vision and goals.
In my experience, conflict can get out of hand if you do not address it at its onset or inform the pastor of the problem. I was curious if any other pastor’s wives have experienced some of the same or similar issues that I have encountered. So, I interviewed several wives from different denominations, ministry experiences, length of the marriage, age, and ethnicity. I am examining conflict resolution skills, decision-making abilities, and interpersonal relationship development skills. The interviews revealed that there was a commonality that may spread across different ministries and denominations. Additionally, we discussed if they have developed a plan of action that has resolved or reduced their problems.
My passion is to become the best champion for Christ, pastor’s wife, effective leader, and develop strategies to lessen conflict's pains. Additionally, I am interested in developing strategies and finding out why competition among women is so difficult. God has or will grant us the wisdom, knowledge, and understanding to overcome any life issues.
Please continue reading and subscribe for additional articles on conflict resolution, mental wellness, self-care, and leadership strategies for the pastor’s wife.
We believe all women can embrace who they are,
can define their future, and can change the world.
Real Talk with the Pastor's Wife will share truths; encourage, and nurture pastor's wives to heal, and inspire them that no matter who or what they are not alone
“Restore, Educate, and Change the way others view the pastor’s wives’ position and purpose.